家人或朋友勢利眼的問題….

PTT看板WomenTalk標題[問題] 有個勢利眼的媽媽
原PO提到自己的媽媽總是灌輸「找對象要找像我表姐老公那種上校有月退俸的,不然就是警察或是公務人員」原PO提到「自認蠻孝順的,會陪爸媽看醫生,買一些營養品給他們補充,因為爸媽身體不算是很健康那種,常常擔心他們……我覺得我心裡都有一種恐懼感,讓我沒辦法離開家太遠。但是這種生活有的時候真的好累…..有的時候不只男朋友,連跟朋友出去她都會說哪些人對你有什麼益處。交朋友難道什麼都要講好處嗎?……當感情有困難的時候媽媽總是落井下石的那個….講到朋友爸媽沒收聘金….但是她突然大暴走說妳是暗示我以後也不能收嗎。我跟妳說 不!可!能!…每次我不忍心離家的原因大概都是想到他們老了兩個孤單在家的畫面….真的是愚孝

網友們回應:「搬出去 問題就先解決一半了」「現在還是可以硬啊」「完全能理解你在說什麼,其實你很知道該怎麼做但又太善良想到他們的立場才會造成自己這張衝突矛盾」「請你估狗「親情勒索」,這不是孝順的問題。」「標準的被綁架一輩子,這樣下去 不是她生病 妳遲早也會生病」
「有種愚孝的感覺,繼續保持適當的反抗較佳。」「過得不快樂就試著改變吧」「要冷靜誠懇的去討論、不管他多失控都要讓他看見你是鎮定理性的。我當時要搬時是態度堅定而且非常冷靜的說、我媽真的有嚇到」「中國式的孝順跟愚忠沒兩樣」「為自己活吧」「中年婦女正常發揮」「不行動的話永遠都只會是抱怨,就差一個決心」「你不在他們就是孤單在家… 你自己也把自己當他們的重心看待阿,醒醒好嗎? 他們有自己的人生,你也有。哪裡孤單…他們還有彼此好嗎」

司馬儀:半數以上或三分之一以上的人都勢利眼,或出社會前沒有,出社會以後還是會。那是資本主義主流價值觀的緣故。解法大概就是增強自己的能力,還沒有想到更好的辦法。

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Wise Library 1985

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