Common Causes of Low Self-Esteem and Solutions

By Research Writer:  Margaret W. Lavigne

Self-esteem is the way you view yourself,including your flaws and personal achievements. People who have low self-esteem tend to view themselves as highly flawed. They tend to think little of their own worth and own achievements.That’s why people with low self-esteem suffer from the idea of ” not good enough yet.” Those who suffer from low self-esteem due to old mental wounds fail to generate a proper accurate self-valuation.And they tend to devalue themselves as others do to them. People with low self-esteem tend to believe they are inferior to others consciously or not. They may accept poor treatment from family members, friends and abusive lovers.  Aside from these, people who have low self-esteem struggle to accept positive feedback and view everyone around them better than themselves.

 

Persons who have experienced trauma tend to have lower self-esteem. It’s  common for teenagers to suffer from low to self-esteem issues. People with low self-esteem are vulnerable at negative words and negative judgments. They would take negative words and negative judgments as attacks or the signs of being unloved or unappreciated. That’s who people who low self-esteem are more likely to suffer from negative emotions, such as sorrow, anxiety disorders and anger.

 

A person with healthy self-esteem is more likely to be motivated to try new things and build new connections. A person with healthy self-esteem is less likely to be irritated due to other’s rudeness.  People who have low self-esteem have a lower ability to deal with failures and embarrassment.That’s why people with low self-esteem have low motivation of pursuing what they want out of life.  Generally, people with low self-esteem are more likely to be trapped by pessimism.  Psychiatrist and author M. Scott Peck believes that if we value ourselves and, we’ll do things that are meaningful, which in turn makes us more valuable. In a word, those who suffer from low self-esteem might stop doing anything to boost their sense of self-worth.

 

Universality of Low Self-Esteem 

According to DoSomething.org, 70% of girls believe they don’t “measure up” or aren’t “good enough” in some way, including physical appearance, school performance and relationships.

 

 

Solution

  1. Take pride in your accomplishments/achievements
  2. Work on your vulnerabilities right now
  3. challenge the negative judgments you have toward yourself.
  4. accept imperfect in life and in yourself : Life can be beautiful without perfection 
  5. To help the weak and the needed: the ability to help others boost our self-esteem 
  6. Replace negative statements with positive statements and note down your good qualities: When you suffer from self-hatred, review the lists will help you get a more correct identification of yourself. 
  7. Keep distance with mean, sour and demeaning persons: People who do not recover from trauma tend to be totally vulnerable to their weakness and flaws, making them more likely to get hurt again. 

 

Common Causes of Low Self-Esteem

  1. trauma or abuse, such as friends’ betrayal, workplace bullying and divorce
  2. being harshly or repeatedly criticized for their poor performance at something

 

Common Signs of Low Self-Esteem

  1. Can’t take compliments
  2. feeling unloved and unwanted
  3. not being able to deal with frustration
  4. overly value other’s feedback or response
  5. prioritize others needs and ignore their own needs 
  6. negative self-talk 
  7. suffer from chronic anxiety
  8. avoid building connections 
  9. fear of failure or embarrassment
  10. low levels of motivation/ avoid taking challenges 

 

People who suffer from low self-esteem tend to suffer from trust issues and negative thoughts  about   future and about oneself that they believe that nothing good will happen and they believe they are worthless consciously or not.  

 

According to Dr. Frank Ochberg, M.D., “Negative thoughts are now included in the definition of post-traumatic stress injury” that  our brain may be wounded after going through a traumatic event or a  profound trauma, which block their positive emotions. In other words, people’s perception of reality  and their self-worth altered and distorted when their heart get terribly hurt.  According to Dr. Frank Ochberg, M.D.,  to overcome negative thoughts, people have to realize that self-hatred is “ not a true assessment of yourself.” Dr. Frank Ochberg, M.D. claims that people’s “ self-view is darker than it deserves to be.” when they suffer from low self-esteem. 

 

Depression and Low Self-Esteem 

I would say, low self-esteem is a common symptom for those who suffer from depression and those who suffer from old mental wounds. Generally, those who suffer from depression have low self-esteem and that’s why they easily get hurt and irritated. 

 

It’s common to encounter people who tend to devalue our self-worth, but people who have a healthy self-esteem tend to laugh it off because they know what people say is not true. Nevertheless, people who have low self-esteem tend to question their self-worth or suffer from self-hatred when they receive negative feedback repeatedly. 

 

Depression saps your energy and motives. There are several types of depressive disorders, such as major depression, (PDD), postpartum depression (PPD), and seasonal affective disorder (SAD).

 

Common Signs of Depression

  1. Irritability
  2. inability to sleep, excessive sleep, insomnia
  3. thoughts of suicide/ suicide attempts
  4. Feeling numb/ fail to experience happiness
  5. self-Isolation: avoid situations, people, places, or events that remind them of the trauma.
  6. low self-esteem
  7. unable to think positively

 

 

What is PTSD ?
PTSD happens when somebody has experienced or witnessed significant trauma.People who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) often struggle with poor self-image, low self-esteem, depression and feelings of worthlessness.

 

Symptom of PTSD
People who suffer from PTSD fail to shake of disturbing flashbacks of traumatic events or malicious judgments from others. 

 

Examples of negative thinking patterns include the following:

  1. Thinking that people always think the worst of you
  2. Ruminate on past errors, own weakness and flaws
  3. Avoid social gatherings because you fear not being good enough to be accepted or excluded or badly judged

 

 

“Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. ”M. Scott Peck

 

Reference

  1. Gift From Within – PTSD Questions & Answers with Frank Ochberg, M.D.
  2. How to support yourself and others who may be struggling with post traumatic stress disorder
  3. PTSD and Low Self Esteem: Any Connection?

 

Wise Library 1985

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  3. Save Regrets in Life: Tips to Repair and Fix Parent-Child Relationship|Wise Library 1985
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  5. The Clear-Cut Answer to Why Rich People Suffer

 

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Margaret W. Lavigne 司馬儀

There’s a strong link between imperfection, unconditional love and posttraumatic growth. In truth, we can only witness unconditional love in the hard times. If you believe in luck or miracles, be aware of the seven deadly sins and the seven heavenly virtues. According to the Bible, no one will be exempt from life challenges, including the chosen ones (1 Peter 1:3-9). God expects us to stay hopeful and “rejoice in our sufferings,” because “trials of various kinds” are training to make us “perfect and complete” (Romans 5:3-6, James 1:1-27). It’s comforting to know that “God promises to make something good out of the storm” (Roman 8: 28). We fall and we learn. As we learn to humble ourselves, life gets better. The connection between the brain and stomach is bidirectional. Excessive sugar intake sabotages our immune system that 70% to 80% of our immunity hinges on our gut health. Memory loss and cognitive impairment are common symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease, all of which are highly connected to type 2 diabetes. Early signs of type 2 diabetes include chronic fatigue, irritability, frequent urination, vision problems and slow wound healing. Depression is prevalent in people with diabetes due to the fact that diabetes causes “structural changes in the brain.” It’s worth noting that muscle-building helps regulate blood sugar levels. There is growing evidence that high blood sugar leads to reduced muscle mass. Beyond that, there’s a strong link between sleep deprivation and emotional weakness Be aware of the power of tenderness, humility and subconscious mind. Generally, negative emotions root in the inability to forgive, vanity or pride. People suffer from suppressed anger. God is watching our every move. God sees through our motives. Mental health crisis is sweeping on a global scale because the core value of capitalism is incompatible with what human truly needs. Money cannot purchase inner peace nor unconditional love. Wealth incurs fair-weather friends, frenemies and snobs. I would say, inner peace is the utmost blessing from God. Trauma is highly linked to chronic fatigue and chronic illness. Take time to deal with your old mental wounds. 這裡不是天堂,我們必須勇敢!這輩子身體顧好了,你就賺到四百萬+++。人生,除了身體健康以外的事都是小事,而生病只是提醒不是懲罰,因為無常是:一個健康的人一出門就沒有再回家了,連道別的機會和準備都沒有。人們錯過的都是最悲傷最真實的故事!因為多數人可以分享的都無關緊要的痛或路人皆知的痛。佛教用因果論概括一切,而聖經主張人生必有難題(包括選民),但好好表現,災難背後會有禮物。如果你以為誰的人生很輕鬆,肯定是你跟對方不熟。脖子控管自律神經!肩頸僵硬,「自律神經」就會被受到壓迫!自律神經失調引發的症狀包括頭痛、暈眩、焦慮、失眠、倦怠、口渴、耳鳴,甚至憂鬱等症狀。自律神經失調了,血液的品質也會跟著惡化!解法:甩手操。建議多按壓頭皮、耳朵和手上的穴道。腸胃健康和大腦健康息息相關,國外大力探討久坐對身體的傷害!健康建議:天芢無糖抹茶搭配芝麻和牛奶X 無糖豆漿X鹼性飲食X淋巴按摩X提高肌肉量(控制血糖的關鍵,糖尿病是可逆轉的)。鈣是解痛劑(看牙科前)。維生素E主修復,可避免留疤。高壓容易緊張族群可多攝取維生素B和鈣的食物。一夜白頭是心理影響身體的鐵證,勿低估負面情緒對身體的傷害,包括生悶氣或憂愁。詳情請參看網站醫療專欄。壞脾氣一定有理由,可能是高血糖或創傷症候群或高壓族群,而壞情緒會把幸運福氣和天使嚇跑。禍福相依,好消息可能會成為頭痛點,壞消息可能成為跳板!不屬於自己的只會逗留,不會久留,勿強求。引用小說《推理愛》:「判斷一個人愛不愛她很難,但判斷一個人珍不珍惜她卻很簡單。」「柔和」「謙卑」與「歸零」的力量。自信缺氧,就用力學習。不自律就無法成為更好的自己,不自律就無法肯定自己!提醒自己做該做的而不是想做的。預防改善糖尿病推薦食材:洋蔥、無糖抹茶、咖哩及酪梨。理財時代,從照顧好自己的健康開始。遠離乳癌,醫師呼籲不要使用塑膠袋裝熱食!國外研究證實:阿茲海默症患者「禁糖」便可望痊癒!人們低估了「糖過量」及「過食」對身體的破壞力。咖啡和巧克力的好被過度放大.精神不濟喝咖啡恐消耗維生素B。聖經說了,說過的每句話都會被記錄在一本書裡!好壞都被記錄了,所以聖經主張人們不可記他人的過錯。最佳午睡時間是20分鐘和90分鐘。以上,互相督促。生命線協談專線:1995 安心專線:1925 張老師專線:1980 自殺防治諮詢安心專線:0800-788995 聯繫司馬儀(譬如跨界合作):Gmail: jpsiawase@gmail.com 

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