成長必修學分|實踐所有願望清單以前,請務必___

實踐所有願望清單以前,請務必好好過日子

 

多數人的願望清單裡都有太多太多願望,太多「自以為理所當然該擁有」的願望清單,包括我。關於願望這件事,某一年開始的生日,不會想許願了,因為願望並不會因為隨口說說就實現。

 

很多人排斥絕對樂觀,但我必須說:絕對悲觀就是沒有好處啊,悲觀只會讓我變醜或者沒有力氣而已!聖經裡面有說:你想要的,你當作已經擁有,然後就會真的擁有(很難)但今天早上的念頭:如果當作兩周後(或三個後)想要的願望就會實現,突然就覺得容易去相信,也容易讓人激奮了。

 

司馬儀:在尋寶的路上,滿載而歸以前,我們可不可以坦然淡定地往前走?因為滿載而歸的那一天,可能是十年後或二十年後,總不能十年後或二十年後才擁抱快樂或幸福吧。我們應該在那以前用力督促自己也肯定自己。

 

體會是:不自律,可以換到一時半刻的享受,可是(事後)卻會換到潛意識更多的自我否定。我也必須說,即便不是馬上,但你早晚都能過上你想過的日子,只是屆時,你也很可能會失去一些你現在擁有的、自認理所當然、卻很珍貴的東西…..

 

多數人可能都無法實踐所有的願望,但我們也會發現,我們對很多東西的憧憬都是帶有錯誤的理解,我們經常對某個東西只是道聽塗說一知半解就產生了憧憬,直到擁有了才發現那並不是適合自己或並不符合自己原本預設的。

很小的時候就有機會明白目睹富裕的人大概會過上什麼樣的日子,經濟無憂的人會少掉經濟這一層煩惱,但他們還是會有其他煩惱。財富給人經濟上的自由和選擇權,譬如住哪裡吃什麼或者不工作不為五斗米折腰的自由。但和一個人快樂與否、充分被愛與否、焦慮與否無關。

 

依照馬斯洛的需求層次理論(Maslow’s hierarchy of needs)「生理」是第一層需求,接著是「安全」、「社交」、「尊重」,最後是「自我實現」( self-actualization)。

蔡康永:「過上自己想過的日子,才算是成功了。」

司馬儀:想過的日子是一個很抽象很模糊的概念,在你想過的日子當中,你的第一優先是什麼?青春、健康、名牌包,或者理想的工作?

Wise Library 1985

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