The Key Factor to Success|Benefits of “Delayed Gratification”

Wise Library 1985 |Margaret W. Lavigne 


The Key Factor to Success|Benefits of “Delayed Gratification”

Do we have the patience for something which is worth fighting for? In the route to our life targets, greater targets usually take more time and effort for sure. Delay of gratification is the act of delaying immediate pleasure or available rewards for a bigger purpose in the hope of achieving a more valuable reward or bigger tremendous returns in the future, which demands high execution of self-control, positive hopeful thinking and patience.  A wealth of researches advocate that those who practice delayed gratification benefit in all sorts of ways. I would say, those who are able to delay gratification are those who are willing to take challenges for something which might take years to grow. 


Stress, especially chronic stress, impairs our ability to delay gratification. Delayed gratification means resisting something you want immediately in exchange for a greater reward later. Those who master delayed gratification are those who are willing to tolerate discomfort by beliving a greater purpose or a greater reward.


Studies show that delayed gratification is one of the most evident personal traits of those who are being successful in a career. Generally, only those who learn how to manage their desires, impulses and dissatisfaction and meanwhile execute high self-discipline are able to build a good life.


The Marshmallow Experiment

In a study published in 1972,  psychologist Walter Mischel set up a psychological experiment with children who ranged between 3 to 5. Mischel’s team told the kids that those who waited for another 15 minutes would get one extra marshmallow and those who couldn’t wait would only have one marshmallow.  The researchers found the children who controlled their impulse and got another marshmallow performed better in schools with greater self-confidence and were less likely to struggle with drug problems in life.


I would say, those who practice delayed gratification are those who are good at controlling their impulses with higher self-discipline. For instance, people with high self-discipline are less likely to cheat and less likely to abuse their body by habitual binge eating. People with low self-discipline are more likely to suffer from regrets because people with low self-discipline are less likely to become a better me.  Altogether, mastering delayed gratification helps boost our self-confidence by knowing that we have the ability to fully control our desires and impulses.


Example of Delayed Gratification
1. saving for that future dream house.
2. Avoid binge eating for the sake of health


Q: Why is “delayed gratification” important to Success?

I would say, delayed gratification is the manifestation of our self-control and self-restraint. Only those who are able to discipline themselves will avoid binge eating, unhealthy snacks, impulses and temptations. Also, delayed gratification is highly associated with the ability to bear uncertainty. 

Greatness, Patience and Success

Rationalize frustrations for the big goals. Career success and interpersonal relationships demand time to nurture love and trust. Coach Wooden says that “I have patience and on the other side I have faith.” He viewed patience as an essential factor in achieving success. Greatness takes time. Patience is the key to success. 


Tremendous Cost of Impatience

As people seek instant reward or instant gratification, they are more likely to make regretful decisions. Impatience clouds our judgments and stops us from making thoughtful sound decisions. Being impatient, we tend to make short-sighted decisions. 


Impatience will develop into a habit or even a personal trait, so is patience.  It’s worth noting that impatience potentially leads to irritability.  People who lack patience have little tolerance for frustration and more likely to suffer from depression. Thus, people who lack patience are more easily to quit what they want out of life. As a person gives up all the things he/she does care, he/she loses energy, enthusiasm and hope unconsciously or lot. Patience gives us hope and courage to fight for the things we want out of life. Impatience occurs due to lack of understanding, wisdom and insight.


Patience helps nurture persistence, motivation and stay hopeful during the hard times. Patience ensures increased satisfaction in life.  Being patient helps us staying out of negative emotions. Patience increases our tolerance for frustrations.


People have difficulty waiting patiently for what they want out of life, such as success in business. Due to the mainstream mass media, the general public tends to believe in early success or easy success. It takes time or even years to master a certain skill. Expertise and career success don’t accomplish overnight. It takes time to develop and actualize a new project. 


Be Patient with Little Progress

Be patient with little progress, no matter how slow it goes. Trust in your capacity to deal with whatever comes your way.


Are you willing to sweat over something you love or something you believe without any material feedback? It’s worth noting that patience helps maintain our enthusiasm and industriousness when pursuing any life targets. Life revolved around uncertainty. The only thing we can control is one’s motive, effort, faith and persistence. Discernment is knowing which are things worthy of our time and effort. 


Rationalize Adversity

Impatience potentially leads to anxiety and surrender.  It demands great patience and faith in achieving anything worthwhile. As Benjamin Franklin said, “Genius is nothing but a greater aptitude for patience.” As Isaac Newton wrote, “If I have ever made any valuable discoveries, it has been owing more to patient attention than to any other talent.” In the book Practical Modern Basketball, Coach Wooden wrote: “Lack of patience is possibly the greatest fault of the beginning coach. Don’t expect too much. Progress comes slowly in many respects. The formation of new habits and the breaking of old are no quick-change propositions.”


Impatience and Anxiety

It feels good to know that our hard work paid off. Toiling with the right motive and right methods matters. People expect immediate desired results. We are living in an age with a low tolerance for frustration. We rarely want to bear frustrations in the route to the end result. This impatience occurs due to void of wisdom. People seem to want things to happen too quickly. People are trapped by the myth of overnight success.


People behave irritably or feel agitated about various frustrations due to an inability to delay gratification. Negative emotions bring out the worst in us. Frustration Happens. Pessimism sabotages our will power and leads to procrastination. Negative emotions make us irritable, hostile, making us tense. What is assured, both impatience and anxiety sabotage our concentration and productivity.


Pleasure Principle

Pleasure is a driving force for sure. The term “pleasure principle” originates from Freudian psychoanalysis, which refers to the instinctual seeking of pleasure and avoidance of pain for the satisfaction of biological and psychological needs. For sure, our desires can’t always be gratified.


How to master through delayed gratification? 

1. Think through the consequences of choices. Avoid rash decisions.

Controlling our impulses helps us build a healthier and happier and more productive life for sure.

2. Focus on the rewards as you are being impatient or impulsive. 



Comparing to pleasure, inner peace and hope are central to our survival.



Take Advice from the Bible 

Indeed, the Bible highly value the power and importance of temperance and self-discipline. Also, laziness and anger are included in the seven deadly sins. According to the Bible, those who fail to control their anger display folly and those who are being lazy doom to bear hunger and poverty. According to the Bible, our gifts given by God is our prophecy. 



  1. ENCYCLOPÆDIA BRITANNICA|  Delay of gratification|Psychology 
  2. The Benefits of Delaying Gratification| Ilene Strauss Cohen Ph.D.|Psychology  Today 
  3. The Restrained Brain: The surprising science of delayed gratification
  4. The Marshmallow Test and Why We Want Instant Gratification: Silvia Barcellos at TED Talk 
  5. Encyclopedia Britannica: Delay of Gratification
  6. Los Angeles Times: The surprising thing the ‘marshmallow test’ reveals about kids in an instant-gratification world
  7. Study Finds 89 Percent of Millennials Want to Own a Home. But 67 Percent Will Have to Wait 20 Years or More to Afford It
  8. Harvard Business Review: Decision Trees for Decision Making
  9. Warren Buffett on Delayed gratification (2019)
  10. “The successful among us delay gratification.” Jordan Peterson


Margaret W. Lavigne 

 Purchase Margaret W. Lavigne’s publications on Amazon



Wise Library 1985

    1. Unforgiveness: Failing to Forgive Sabotages Your Mental and Physical Health
    2. Tips to Embrace Positive Emotions: Smiling with Eyes Comforts Your Brain
    3. Global Capitalist Society |Universal Job Snobbery and Anxiety Epidemic
    4. Common Causes of Liver Disease and Brain Fog: Chronic Stress and Depression
    5. Negative Thoughts Change Our Gene Expression
    6. Save Regrets in Life: Tips to Repair and Fix Parent-Child Relationship



Margaret W. Lavigne 司馬儀

There’s a strong link between imperfection, unconditional love and posttraumatic growth. In truth, we can only witness unconditional love in the hard times. If you believe in luck or miracles, be aware of the seven deadly sins and the seven heavenly virtues. According to the Bible, no one will be exempt from life challenges, including the chosen ones (1 Peter 1:3-9). God expects us to stay hopeful and “rejoice in our sufferings,” because “trials of various kinds” are training to make us “perfect and complete” (Romans 5:3-6, James 1:1-27). It’s comforting to know that “God promises to make something good out of the storm” (Roman 8: 28). We fall and we learn. As we learn to humble ourselves, life gets better. The connection between the brain and stomach is bidirectional. Excessive sugar intake sabotages our immune system that 70% to 80% of our immunity hinges on our gut health. Memory loss and cognitive impairment are common symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease, all of which are highly connected to type 2 diabetes. Early signs of type 2 diabetes include chronic fatigue, irritability, frequent urination, vision problems and slow wound healing. Depression is prevalent in people with diabetes due to the fact that diabetes causes “structural changes in the brain.” It’s worth noting that muscle-building helps regulate blood sugar levels. There is growing evidence that high blood sugar leads to reduced muscle mass. Beyond that, there’s a strong link between sleep deprivation and emotional weakness Be aware of the power of tenderness, humility and subconscious mind. Generally, negative emotions root in the inability to forgive, vanity or pride. People suffer from suppressed anger. God is watching our every move. God sees through our motives. Mental health crisis is sweeping on a global scale because the core value of capitalism is incompatible with what human truly needs. Money cannot purchase inner peace nor unconditional love. Wealth incurs fair-weather friends, frenemies and snobs. I would say, inner peace is the utmost blessing from God. Trauma is highly linked to chronic fatigue and chronic illness. Take time to deal with your old mental wounds. 這裡不是天堂,我們必須勇敢!這輩子身體顧好了,你就賺到四百萬+++。人生,除了身體健康以外的事都是小事,而生病只是提醒不是懲罰,因為無常是:一個健康的人一出門就沒有再回家了,連道別的機會和準備都沒有。人們錯過的都是最悲傷最真實的故事!因為多數人可以分享的都無關緊要的痛或路人皆知的痛。佛教用因果論概括一切,而聖經主張人生必有難題(包括選民),但好好表現,災難背後會有禮物。如果你以為誰的人生很輕鬆,肯定是你跟對方不熟。脖子控管自律神經!肩頸僵硬,「自律神經」就會被受到壓迫!自律神經失調引發的症狀包括頭痛、暈眩、焦慮、失眠、倦怠、口渴、耳鳴,甚至憂鬱等症狀。自律神經失調了,血液的品質也會跟著惡化!解法:甩手操。建議多按壓頭皮、耳朵和手上的穴道。腸胃健康和大腦健康息息相關,國外大力探討久坐對身體的傷害!健康建議:天芢無糖抹茶搭配芝麻和牛奶X 無糖豆漿X鹼性飲食X淋巴按摩X提高肌肉量(控制血糖的關鍵,糖尿病是可逆轉的)。鈣是解痛劑(看牙科前)。維生素E主修復,可避免留疤。高壓容易緊張族群可多攝取維生素B和鈣的食物。一夜白頭是心理影響身體的鐵證,勿低估負面情緒對身體的傷害,包括生悶氣或憂愁。詳情請參看網站醫療專欄。壞脾氣一定有理由,可能是高血糖或創傷症候群或高壓族群,而壞情緒會把幸運福氣和天使嚇跑。禍福相依,好消息可能會成為頭痛點,壞消息可能成為跳板!不屬於自己的只會逗留,不會久留,勿強求。引用小說《推理愛》:「判斷一個人愛不愛她很難,但判斷一個人珍不珍惜她卻很簡單。」「柔和」「謙卑」與「歸零」的力量。自信缺氧,就用力學習。不自律就無法成為更好的自己,不自律就無法肯定自己!提醒自己做該做的而不是想做的。預防改善糖尿病推薦食材:洋蔥、無糖抹茶、咖哩及酪梨。理財時代,從照顧好自己的健康開始。遠離乳癌,醫師呼籲不要使用塑膠袋裝熱食!國外研究證實:阿茲海默症患者「禁糖」便可望痊癒!人們低估了「糖過量」及「過食」對身體的破壞力。咖啡和巧克力的好被過度放大.精神不濟喝咖啡恐消耗維生素B。聖經說了,說過的每句話都會被記錄在一本書裡!好壞都被記錄了,所以聖經主張人們不可記他人的過錯。最佳午睡時間是20分鐘和90分鐘。以上,互相督促。生命線協談專線:1995 安心專線:1925 張老師專線:1980 自殺防治諮詢安心專線:0800-788995 聯繫司馬儀(譬如跨界合作):Gmail: 


1 個回應

  1. Vincent表示:

    Very insightful.You are a talented writer. Thank you for inspiring me.



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